A [email protected] in the life of a first-time mother
You must be super excited to join work post maternity leave, feeling refreshed after a long break, hoping for some adult interaction and conversations other than diapers and drools. Spoiler Alert, here is what to expect.
1. If you are hoping for interesting adult conversations during coffee breaks which you missed badly, it goes something like this…
“How old is she”? (8 months old and it hasn’t changed since you asked last week, I quip)
Who does she look like? (a baby human of course, I reply with a wry smile)
Has she started talking? Does she miss you when you are here? (She says papa, mamma, she likes to dance, we take her swimming during the weekends, let me show you her swimming video, I say excitedly) ?
“Oh, You are such a typical mother, always taking about the baby, there are other things to talk about! (Like, Seriously? I wonder!)
It is highly likely that you will be continuously bombarded with questions like “How is the baby, who takes care of her”? and comments like “You look tired in spite of your long vacation” and casual judgements like “You left her alone with a nanny? Can’t trust anyone these days” or “You left her in a daycare? She is too small for that”.
Now you may have second thoughts and try the “work from home” option for a while. The myth about WFH is that you think you will get to be with the baby all the time, won’t miss her first words and first steps and still enjoy the perks of being in a corporate role.
Well, the truth about WFH is that, you constantly feel guilty about either playing with the baby instead of working or not spending time with the baby while wondering what she is doing next door and pretending to work. In short you end up working more or at least it looks like you are working way more than you should.
By now, if you are feeling pathetic and guilty and already making plans to quit, my dear, you have arrived. You have earned the “working mom” status! Just hang in there, you will get used to the drill. All the best!